You’re not the average guy. She wouldn’t want to date you if you were. But thinking outside of the box for a date night to prove your above average status can be hard work. And we all know that a poorly planned date can be like standing on the sinking Titanic, except instead of hearing the orchestra play to the bitter end, it’s just the sound of silence – and no, not Simon & Garfunkel…just actual awkward silence. So to save you from the clumsy moments of checking your smartphone for the umpteenth time in hopes that Will Smith from Hitch would save you via text (he won’t), we put together a few plug-and-play date ideas (female approved) for your next night out with that sig other (or prospect).
And remember, when it comes to planning a date night, a little sprezzatura goes a long way. You want your outfit to be just like the date itself – smooth and charming so that it looks like you tried, but not overly planned out like you tried too hard. With that said, a little thought can go a long way.
Here are five date and adjacent outfit ideas that will set you apart from the rest:
Date Idea #1: “Skip the French fries.”
Women love anything French (we asked around to confirm). Simply mention Paris and most women will have La Vie en Rose playing in their heads. There’s something overtly romantic and sexy about all things French. Parisian chic is way different from chic. Chanel Paris, way different than Chanel SoHo. This is your chance to make her feel sexy, make her think you’re cultured (whether you are or not) and increase your chances of amour. Start out with a nice French dinner and order something using the proper pronunciations – e.g., coq au vin is not pronounced “cock ow vin”, which sounds like the undesirable symptom of an STD. After dinner, watch some independent French flick with subtitles and end your evening with macaroons from somewhere like Ladurée. Make sure to buy her some to take home so she thinks of you and your romantically French evening the next day.
The Look:
- Club Monaco Joshua Stripped Crew Neck
- Jcrew Secret Wash Button Down
- Bonobos Travel Jeans to Oslo
- Dolce & Gabbana Patterned Scarf
- Vans White Canvas Sneakers
Date Idea #2: “Top Chef”
A cooking class could be a good indicator of whether you’ll have to feign enjoyment whenever she wants to cook for you in the future. This kind of a date really scores points on both cultural and culinary levels. Women love doing something in addition to actually getting a meal. And depending on how your date is going, she’ll be thinking about the next time you two can cook something up before you’re even eating. Whether you can tell a chef’s knife from a santoku isn’t the point here. You’ll engage in a shared learning experience with an amazing meal at the end. Wear a shirt that looks better with the sleeves rolled up, something where you won’t flip out over a beet splash or wine stain…but keep the club soda nearby just in case.
The Look:
- North Coast Slim Fit Chambray Shirt
- J.crew Essential Chino in Urban Slim Fit
- Club Monaco Kostas Brown Belt
- Thomas Dean Polished Chukka Boots
- Mougan & Picquard Watch
Date Idea #3: “Don’t get wine wasted.”
Wine tasting involves words like: notes, floral, legs and finishes. You’d be wise to take advantage of those key words. It’s okay if you don’t know wine; vulnerability is an opportunity to show an ability to adapt. Just make sure to hold your own. There’s nothing more amateur than a grown man that can’t hold down his alcohol. Taste each wine offered, but know that you don’t have to drink the entire glass of each – this isn’t your college fraternity wine tour where a wine glass substitutes as a king-sized shot glass. Don’t chug, guzzle or gulp. Sip and enjoy – you might actually find a wine you both enjoy and you can bring to date #2. So keep your outfit classy and finish strong.
The Look:
- Black Lapel Blazer
- Black Lapel White Dress Shirt
- Jean Machine J.M-2 Straight Leg
- Miansai Waypoint All-leather Bracelet
- Grenson Sharp leather Brown Boots
New York City Date Spot Tip: Ardesia, Terroir
Date Idea #4: “No air guitar here.”
What is more quintessential New York than a jazz club? There are a couple of things to note here. You don’t want to look like you’re a part of the band and at the same time, you don’t want to look like you’re attending a poetry slam. Leave the scraggly hair at home, get a haircut and don’t wear a beret or a turtleneck. There will be no “slappin’ the bass” or air guitar either. Save that for karaoke. It will be loud, and the only chance to talk will be in between songs or sets. You’ll have to lean in close to hear each other so make sure to wear some sensible cologne.
The Look:
- Black Lapel Charcoal Windowpane Suit
- Black Lapel Pink Micro Check Shirt
- Black Lapel Purple Birds Eye Pocket Square
- Allen Edmonds Clifton Oxfords
- Timex 1600 Watch
- Bulgari Man Cologne
New York City Date Spot Recommendation:Blue Note Jazz Club, Dizzy’s
Date Idea #5: “S’more of what?”
This is not so much a date as a trip, so it might be for those who are well on their way towards establishing labels. But if you’re getting there, get your outdoorsman on and take her camping. You guys should be far enough along in your relationship that you know she’s one of those down, doesn’t mind getting dirt under her nails type of girls. If you’re not, you’ll find out soon enough. Skip the air mattress and opt for a snug sleeping bag. Marshmallows, graham crackers, chocolate and of course, a good bottle of peaty scotch are all a must. This will be a chance to show a different side of your style. A chance to get out of your 9 to 9 look and something more casual, functional but still stylish.
The Look:
- Barbour Duracotton Polarquilt
- Wallace & Barnes Camp Shirt
- Gant Puffer Vest
- Bespoke Cords
- Red Wing Shoes Iron Ranger Leather Boots (caveat: don’t try to climb the Himalayas in these)
- Asos Orange Fleck Beanie
New York City Date Spot Recommendation: Harriman/Bear Mountain
These are just few or many date options you can choose from. Think of these options as more than just a unique itinerary to impress her, but a recon mission of sorts for deeper insight into a potential companion. That cooking date will tell you whether or not your future children will actually appreciate home cooking over microwaveables. That camping trip will tell you whether she’s the high-maintenance type who will either go ape-sh*t over a spider or the down-to-earth type who’s ready to go into hunter-gatherer mode with you. Regardless of what you decide to do, remember to plan your outfit with as much thought as the way you plan your date.
Have other date ideas? Have some favorite venues? Have a can’t miss go-to first date game plan? Wild first date stories? Share them all with us in the comments!






19 comments
Ed Choi says:
Jan 31, 2013
What about THE HUSBAND LOOK? We too go on dates. Even if it’s with the same girl over and over and over(did I say over?) again…
Where’s the love Black Lapel! You can call it Date Idea #6: “Leave the kids home”
Black Lapel says:
Jan 31, 2013
LOL, duly noted Ed! We will have something for the married fellas in a future edition! Speaking of which, where do YOU take the missus??
Kesean Kenton says:
Jan 31, 2013
Love these styles.
Black Lapel says:
Jan 31, 2013
Apparently Kesean Kenton has good taste.
Jovan says:
Jan 31, 2013
Good ideas. If you want another good suggestion for oxford cloth button-down and chambray shirts: Ratio Clothing. They’re less than $100, made in USA, made to order for your chest, neck, sleeves, height, and preferred fit. Beware though — the Slim Fit is VERY slim, so I’d encourage going with the Classic Fit at first (which is still trim fitting).
Jovan says:
Jan 31, 2013
Oh, and for trim chinos I heartily recommend Jack Donnelly Slim Fit. They’re just a tad slim in the seat for me, but for most guys without too much junk in the trunk they’ll be fine. They’re well proportioned, just slim enough and with a decent rise that isn’t too low or high for most guys. Again, can’t beat made in USA for under $100. I have a link for $20 off the first purchase on my blog’s review of them which makes them an even better value.
Black Lapel says:
Jan 31, 2013
Thanks for the smart recommendations Jovan. Ratio Clothing is a great company that works on a more approximate fit based on off the rack sizing. Definitely a time saver for the guys not aiming for a flawless fit. Good job on the Jack Donnelly review!
Nick says:
Feb 16, 2013
Leave it to Black Lapel to respond to a positive review of their direct competitor in a positive way.
Marco says:
Jan 31, 2013
You should do another article, like the one on Bond 007
Black Lapel says:
Jan 31, 2013
Challenge accepted Marco! Point us in the right direction – what would you like to see?
Joseph says:
Jan 31, 2013
I love the articles! If you’re ever looking to expand your material to college campuses to get younger folks into it; I’m an undergraduate student at Duke University and I’m your guy!
But seriously (not that I wasn’t serious), great article!
Black Lapel says:
Jan 31, 2013
Thanks Joseph, glad you liked it man! Let us know what you have in mind in terms of collegiate material expansion!
Terrence says:
Feb 1, 2013
Interesting; while I always appreciate fashion and being classy. I don’t feel any of these looks are “ethnic friendly”.
With the exception of the Jazz Club , which is universally acceptable.
Man bracelets and chinos…
canvas boat shoes and a scarf…
I’m not exactly seeing an “urban” appeal for a date, most people these days are an amalgamation of styles and influences.
It all comes across as more “New Englander” or even “WASPish”
Then again, as they say; its all in how you wear it.
Black Lapel says:
Feb 1, 2013
Hi Terrence, Thanks for your thoughtful feedback. We were not necessarily going for “ethnic friendly” with these outfits, but rather “context friendly” to each date setting. And keep mind these outfits represent just one possibility of many for each date spot. We always encourage our readers to take what you like, discard what you don’t, and ultimately create an outfit that are uniquely theirs. Or as you so aptly put, “it’s all in how you wear it.”
paul says:
Feb 4, 2013
Who dresses up like that to go camping…clearly someone who does not go often. /rolls eyes
Black Lapel says:
Feb 4, 2013
Paul, thanks for the feedback!
1) You called it – we don’t go camping often!

2) But when we do go camping, its perfectly acceptable for us to look more stylish than 99% of other campers.
3) Variety is the spice of life, and we’re trying to recommend pieces you can wear during camping but get use out of outside of the woods too. All the more important with the limited closet space that city slickers like us have to work with!
4) That being said, we’ll be the first to acknowledge there is likely a tradeoff when it come to form vs. function. The camping noobs on Team BL would love some recommendations on more functional pieces from you!
Cheers!
Jcm says:
Feb 9, 2013
I Like these styles. Good job and good selection
Black Lapel says:
Feb 9, 2013
Thanks JCM! Glad you enjoyed these. Which one’s your favorite?
Jcm says:
Feb 13, 2013
My favorite style is the jazz club but i like the camping style too.